You may have noticed that I (Becky) do a lot of the writing
on this blog. For that reason, it has
turned into a sort of “missionary mommy blog” where you get the perspective of
the wife of the missionary doing the “mission” work. As the blog turned into this, rather than a
mode of frequently updating you on Jonathan’s work at EBCoM, we both started to
see the value in this perspective. Many
times, the missionary’s work is seen as spreading the Gospel message of Christ
through telling people groups about Jesus who have never heard about Him
before. In our case, Jonathan is
building up the existing church through training pastors and lay leaders in Biblical knowledge,
history and application. He also
preaches at BIC churches, often accompanied by church leaders to encourage more
remote congregations. But, there is another side to missions.
When we became missionaries, we didn’t cease being husband and wife OR parents. In fact, what I came to do is to continue my role of supporting Jonathan and my role as the mother of our children by raising them at home, just like when we were home in PA. This is not how every missionary does it - we're all different - but this is how we have decided to do it in this season.
In my daily missionary work, I am spreading the Gospel through the way I act, the words I sing, the things I do or don’t do with my children, the way I discipline myself and my children, the books I read, the pictures I draw, the imaginary worlds I enter into, the dancing and wrestling I participate in, the giggles I share, and the hugs and kisses I give. I rarely get to engage with Malawians beyond friendly greetings and buying vegetables. I don’t lead any Bible studies, although I do teach kids Sunday School once a month. I don’t translate the Bible into other languages – I’m struggling just to learn Chichewa, the local language here. So, many days it is easy to feel a sense of defeat. How can I call myself a missionary?!?!
When we became missionaries, we didn’t cease being husband and wife OR parents. In fact, what I came to do is to continue my role of supporting Jonathan and my role as the mother of our children by raising them at home, just like when we were home in PA. This is not how every missionary does it - we're all different - but this is how we have decided to do it in this season.
In my daily missionary work, I am spreading the Gospel through the way I act, the words I sing, the things I do or don’t do with my children, the way I discipline myself and my children, the books I read, the pictures I draw, the imaginary worlds I enter into, the dancing and wrestling I participate in, the giggles I share, and the hugs and kisses I give. I rarely get to engage with Malawians beyond friendly greetings and buying vegetables. I don’t lead any Bible studies, although I do teach kids Sunday School once a month. I don’t translate the Bible into other languages – I’m struggling just to learn Chichewa, the local language here. So, many days it is easy to feel a sense of defeat. How can I call myself a missionary?!?!
I’ve felt called for as long as I can remember to be a
teacher, a missionary and a mom. I’ve
been all three of these things already in different forms, but as I dig deeper
into the calling of being a mom and missionary, I’m starting to see how calling
can have phases and chapters in our lives as well. Just because I feel called to all three of
these things does not mean I need to do each one at maximum strength all my
life long! Each role has many ways of
playing out in life, well beyond what immediately comes to mind when you hear
“teacher,” “missionary,” and “mom.”
Over the past 9 months I’ve really wrestled with this. I want to engage with other Malawians more
deeply. I want to really learn Chichewa
to better communicate with others. I want to connect with the kids in the preschool on campus and the women in the wives' program. I want to translate children's books and read them in Chichewa. I want to....well, the daydreams go on and on. As I
have expressed this longing to do more and feeling of defeat when I can’t seem to reach
out much further than my own children, I have gotten very consistent feedback
from past and present missionaries and moms.
Give yourself a break. Give your kids a break.
Your children ARE your first mission field.
Your children ARE your first mission field.
Spreading the Gospel as a mom starts with my own
children. If they are neglected, much
more harm can be done. A friend recently
told me of a missionary kid’s plea “How many African souls were worth mine?” In training, another missionary
kid’s struggle with his dad was shared, “Would you love me if I were African?” Missionaries can be so engrossed in their own
work that they neglect their own family. This does not reflect the Gospel well to their children nor to those to
whom they are preaching!
So, as I snuggle up with my kiddos to read another book…
or run inside to get a pair of pants so Micah can wear
them on his head to be a turtle (!)…
or answer continuous questions of “why”…
or teach my kids how to share...again…
or coax “just three more bites” into a reluctant mouth…
or join in the spontaneous pint-sized dancing going on in
the living room…
or simply play with my kids as they attempt to make sense of the world around them...
or simply play with my kids as they attempt to make sense of the world around them...
I am loving my kids.
And that love opens their ears and eyes and hearts to what I
do and say and believe.
My little "turtle" :o) |
My cutie-pie |
And I believe in God the Father Almighty,
Who sent His love to us through Jesus,
Who opened the door for us to come back to God, forgiven.
God, who wants to snuggle up with us, His children, and tell us how much He loves us
and wants to be in our lives.
And as my kids see that and believe that and live that out too, that’s called discipleship.
Letting the kids splash in the puddles because rainy season only comes but once a year! |
There very well may be other chapters coming where I exercise other roles and talents in my life in different ways than I am able
to now. One missionary recently commented how she's lived longer than she ever imagined she would and has had time for many different ministries after her years of raising little ones. This gives me hope and encouragement.
So, for now, I’m discovering this chapter. In this freedom to discover, I find challenge, joy and delight in my children. I think God delights in that, too.
So, for now, I’m discovering this chapter. In this freedom to discover, I find challenge, joy and delight in my children. I think God delights in that, too.
Becky, these are wise words for any mom, "missionary" or not. God is love; what better thing to demonstrate to your children and to those you encounter, what better thing for them to absorb and imitate.
ReplyDeleteThank you for loving and caring.
Beth
So well written--very clear presentation of the day-to-day reality of "missionary mom" life. Every blog seems to be even better than the last. (No, not just because you're my daughter.) And I see continuity, remembering your Grandma W. was a regular letter-writer and jotter-down of daily events, I still "play with words" in various contexts, and here you are, doing it all electronically.
ReplyDeleteOf course, the pictures are great, too!
You are absolutely right! There are seasons for our callings! Mine have been mother, teacher, musician, pastor and walker. They seem always to touch and circle around each other, but in different proportions and ways. I wouldn't have known the pastor one without the mother-teacher-musician ones. The walker one was one of my first but got put on hold so many years because of the others. Oh, how I loved being home with my little ones, but so many times during that season of life I felt I was not measuring up to God's call...wasn't doing enough. How silly of me!! Do what you are doing now with joy and let the rest go for a season.
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